Jen Groth

Releasing Control & Trusting God in the midst of Addiction

Jen has experienced many struggles, but the biggest challenge came a few years ago. Looking back, Jen now realizes that God prepared her to face that challenge and used it to grow her and her family’s faith. 

Jen and her husband, Carl, had been married for fifteen years. They had their ups and downs due to Carl’s struggle with alcohol and drugs. But after they both came to faith in Christ, God began working to restore their marriage. Shortly after coming to faith, Jen and Carl joined a Community Group at Northridge and were baptized together. God was teaching them many things and strengthening their marriage, but a challenge came that neither was expecting.

An Unexpected Challenge

In October 2021, Carl was attacked by dogs at work when making a pizza delivery. It was a traumatic and unexpected attack that left Carl with physical and emotional scars. They were grateful that he was alive, but it still left him injured and out of work. They faced many unknowns for what the future would look like for them.

WHEC10 News Story: https://www.whec.com/archive/pizza-delivery-man-attacked-by-dogs-in-rush/

Carl was experiencing nightmares, PTSD, and other health issues on top of his pain. Eventually, he turned back to drugs. Jen was devastated after finding out Carl had relapsed. Despite these challenges, she chose to stay and walk alongside Carl in his struggle. The first relapse after the dog attack was in February 2022. Carl went back and forth to drugs and was in and out of rehab. Jen prayed that God would reveal himself to Carl and provide a way out when drugs tempted him. She hoped Carl could hold on to Scripture and relationships with Community Group members to help strengthen him.

The Gift of Community

During this time, Jen realized how important it was for her to have a personal relationship with God and the support of her Community Group. It was these relationships that helped get her through. It was a blessing for Jen and Carl to experience community with people who provided a safe space. Because of Carl’s past choices, Jen’s family cut off interactions with him. Finding family through their Community Group and people who were welcoming and supportive of Carl provided much-needed support in a difficult time. Jen realized that God had provided the gift of community and family to walk alongside her.

Anxiety Strikes

Early in the summer of 2022, there was a traumatic incident when Jen’s anxiety was triggered. For the next month, Jen couldn’t eat, drink or sleep. She was scared, especially when dusk came, and her anxiety would take over. Later, Jen realized it was her body responding to the trauma she’d experienced. She acknowledged she had taken on the pressure to keep Carl from relapsing by constantly tracking his location, not allowing him access to credit cards, and monitoring his activities. She realized she’d been trying to control things when she should have depended on God instead.

God Intervenes

Months before Jen’s traumatic incident, she found herself waking up at night with the lyrics of Christian songs in her head. She didn’t know why, but it happened repeatedly, so she wrote the words down. On the nights when she was shaking from anxiety, Jen was able to go back and look at the song lyrics to remind herself of God’s love for her. She said she was never good at scripture memorization, but song lyrics have always been easy to remember. What a comforting thought to realize God knew she’d be facing anxiety and had been preparing her to deal with it. Jen used the song lyrics as a springboard to help her pray. 

Early in her walk with God, Jen thought prayer had to be done at a certain time and way. Through a study on prayer she did with her Community Group ladies while she was struggling with anxiety, Jen learned that prayer is just a conversation with God. He already knows everything about us, so to try and hide it from him, we're just hurting ourselves. Talking with God should be just like talking to a best friend, and that’s what Jen started to do. Through prayer, Jen realized she needed to deepen her relationship with God and began reading short devotionals in the morning, at noon, and in the evening that reminded her that God was with her. This helped her anxiety and gave her peace at night.

A Praying Life: Connecting with God in a Distracting World by Paul E. Miller

Getting Help In Carl’s Addiction

In trying to work through Carl’s addiction problem, Jen and Carl decided together that he needed to go to an inpatient rehab in Boston to help him deal with his relapse and the PTSD that he was suffering from. After some time, he was allowed a phone. Jen and Carl were able to do Bible reading devotionals together. One question they started answering daily was, “What are you grateful for?” Even after returning home from rehab, Carl and Jen continued to do Bible reading plans and answer that question. Viewing her situation through the lens of gratitude helped Jen realize that no matter how awful your circumstances are, God always provides things to be thankful for. Continuing to have these conversations with Carl after he returned home allowed him to reestablish trust in God and His goodness, and it encouraged Carl to make better choices. 

“What are you grateful for?”

Trusting God

As of July 2024, Carl celebrated two years sober! He still deals with anxiety and pain, but God has renewed him. He knows that he is forgiven and can participate in Bible studies and personal prayer. Jen looks back and sees how God used pain and suffering to grow her faith. She said, “When you expect an outcome from God, He’s the One that ultimately decides what it will look like, but God can deliver bigger and better than what we expect.” God has been faithful to remind her of His presence and allow her to use prayer and Scripture to find strength in moments when she feels weak. Jen knows that God has a hold on Carl’s life and can provide a way out when tempted. Now, Jen chooses to trust God about the future. Regardless of the choices Carl makes, Jen will not blame God. Her relationship with God has grown so strong that she no longer puts the burden of controlling everything on herself but gives it to God. He provides the peace she needs to trust in Him.

Next
Next

Baptism: Mak Hayes